...But Seriously Folks

Headline: Panda bites man, man bites him back

2006-09-20T10:05:00.000-07:00

http://apnews.myway.com/article/20060920/D8K8II2G3.html

Headline: Panda bites man, man bites him back

And no, it's not a fake headline.

Adding insult to injury

2006-07-18T01:20:00.000-07:00

http://sports.espn.go.com/ncb/news/story?id=2517144

Ha ha ha ha.. Lipscomb we OWN you!

2006-06-29T00:32:00.000-07:00

http://www.wired.com/wired/archive/14.07/murdoch_pr.html

An outstanding article recapping the phenomenon of MySpace and the far-reaching effects that News Corp's purchasing of MySpace will have for their future business model, why Viacom missed out big time, and many other issues relating to MySpace and how it's changing how Big Media is being forced to deal with the times.

And yes, Lefty choked big time.

Lefty eyes third in a row

2006-06-17T22:13:00.000-07:00

Even when some shots aren't going right, Phil Mickelson can do no wrong at the U.S. Open.

It was certainly fitting, then, that Lefty's opening tee shot on day three hooked far right of the fairway. What would have been disaster for most players ended up rosey for Phil, as the ball richoched back onto the middle of the fairway 187 yards from the pin.

Mickelson made par on that hole, as he did on so many others in this tournament.

After a so-so 1-over 36 front nine that saw Mickelson birdie 4 and 6 but bogey 3, 8, and 9, Mickelson caught fire on the back nine.

In all but the first hole of the final nine, Mickelson put himself in position where he had at least a putt for birdie, which he successfully converted on 14 and 16 to finish up his round with a dramatic 1-under 69.

If the storyline holds tomorrow afternoon, Lefty will collect his third straight major on a legendarily difficult course by playing it steady.

With Tiger long gone, and with nearly every other contender fading away by adding strokes to their final score, Phil has a chance to put this one away too.

Several of the lesser-known players began to buckle under the pressure yesterday.

The leader at the start of day three, Steve Stricker, by no means eliminated himself from contention, but with a 6-over 76, he erased his 1-under 139 and is now tied for fourth.

Englishman Kenneth Ferrie bogied 18 to drop himself into a tie with Mickelson, but has followed up oustanding front nines (an astounding 4-under 32 in round two, followed by an impressive 2-under 34 in round three) the past two days with weaker back nines (2 over 38 and 1 over 37) the last two rounds. As Mickelson can tell you, it is imperative to finish strong if you want to win.
Aussie Geoff Ogilvy righted what could have been a disasterous back nine by salvaging a 2 over 36, but clearly let a disagreement over shot selection with his caddie affect him. Although he is obviously close at one shot back, in the future he should either overrule his caddie or not let the disagreement bother him as it did.

All of which brings us back to Lefty. There are several reasons why he should be the favorite, but there are really three main ones:

No player is more prepared. Mickelson played nearly a dozen practice rounds at Winged Foot leading up to the Open, and keeps with him a notebook filled with invaluable tidbits on how to approach various situations. Phil's been slightly more aggressive with certain shots than other players, but proved time and time again (especially on the back nine) that he knew where to put the ball, and how to finish off holes the right way.

No other player has the crowd support. From the moment Phil appeared on his way to the opening tee, he was greeted with a roar of approval from the crowd that supported him every step of the way. It takes a special kind of athlete to thrive under that kind of pressure, but Phil seems to have figured out how, seemingly giving nods and tips of his hat to the gallery following every shot. If he is in the lead or close to it heading down the back stretch, the crowd may put him over.

No player has been more consistent. Only one player (4th place Ian Poulter, who is three shots back) has more pars (39) than Phil (38), while Colin Montgomerie (also in 4th place) has 38 as well. Mickelson is also tied for 2nd on putting average, an even 1.50 per hole. But most telling is that despite giving himself some pretty tough lies, Lefty has yet to make worse than bogey on any hole. Given the course conditions, that's pretty remarkable.

The leaderboard may be tied, but this is Phil's Open to lose.

(See? I can write about stuff besides hockey and politics :) )

A great day for freedom

2006-06-08T06:14:00.000-07:00

http://apnews.myway.com/article/20060608/D8I41K780.html

Abu Musab Al-Zarqawi is dead.

This is a great day for freedom, a great day for Iraq, and a great day for America.

Consequently, it is a bad day for Democrats.

Don't be fooled into believing anything else.

New Weird Al track

2006-06-07T17:48:00.000-07:00

Holy crap!!

www.weirdal.com

Update: Record for college students to shoot for

2006-05-23T11:29:00.000-07:00

http://www.breitbart.com/news/2006/05/23/D8HPG6OG1.html

This guy apparently had TWICE the amount typically fatal in most humans in his system. I don't think that'll be broken for some time.

Especially funny is this line:

"Sungaila...told police he had been drinking the night before and tried to freshen up by downing a pint of beer for breakfast."

An oldie but a goodie

2006-05-20T11:17:00.000-07:00

http://www.comcast.net/news/strange/index.jsp?cat=STRANGE&fn=/2006/05/20/395980.html&cvqh=itn_girl10

Which once again proves my theory: Women can't drive.

How a liberal views the War on Terror

2006-05-04T17:53:00.000-07:00

It’s kind of like this:

If you took a bomb, lit its fuse, and held it in front of you, even a liberal has trouble denying the imminent danger it poses.

However, if you were to hold it behind you after lighting it, and only allow peeks of it every so often, a liberal, given their extraordinary short memory, would forget about it, deny it’s there, and insist that it’s not an immediate threat.

That’s kind of like how a liberal views the War on Terror, in terms even they can understand.

Two more

2006-05-03T22:00:00.000-07:00

http://www.ajc.com/news/content/business/coke/stories/bizbeverage_3.html

Is there any wonder Georgia is in trouble? This girl can't figure out how to use a vending machine.

Yikes.

http://www.ajc.com/metro/content/metro/atlanta/stories/0504metrapshooting.html?imw=Y

"T.I. Not Injured In Ohio Shootout"

Thank God! That almost ruined my entire day!

Because I just love you so much...

2006-05-03T08:58:00.000-07:00

Because I have three articles due very soon, I'm updating this, of course!

Here's a double dose today:

http://reuters.myway.com/article/20060503/2006-05-03T121624Z_01_L0381917_RTRIDST_0_NEWS-SCIENCE-OBESITY-DC.html

This gentleman is, um, large. Michael Moore is jealous.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2006/05/03/AR2006050300319_pf.html

Congratulations. The anti-freedom (not anti-obesity, as they claim) crowd has won a major battle.

Apparently elemantary and middle-school kids are too stupid to stop buying regular sodas, so that choice has now been taken away from them.

This line is particularly telling:

"Soda has been a particular target of those fighting obesity because of its caloric content and popularity among children." So because it's popular, they shut it down?

Apparently making Coca-Cola Zero and Pepsi One wasn't enough.

And besides, does anybody really think this will stop kids from having soda at school? Now, because somebody has decided "You can't buy that here" for some arbitrary reason, kids will simply bring it to school with them.

Your modern Democratic party hard at work.

This is yet another extension of this stupid "It takes a village" mentality.

No. It does not take a village. It takes two parents that are responsible. That's it.

If this "anti-freedom... I mean, anti-obesity" crowd actually cared about the root problem, they'd fight to teach more personal responsiblity to schoolkids, not take away their sodas.

The Season is over

2006-04-18T10:45:00.000-07:00

I guess I know what hockey heartbreak feels like.

It's kind of like being punched in the stomach, slapped in the face, and kicked in the crotch. Only not as much fun.

Vokoun out for playoffs

2006-04-10T09:59:00.000-07:00

http://msn.foxsports.com/nhl/story/5491550

This is bad.. Really really bad..

Wonderful

2006-04-06T21:31:00.000-07:00

Boy, today's been wonderful.

First Atlanta loses to TAMPA BAY in the shootout.

Then I find out the night before my test I've lost my textbook. Lovely.

This job can be pretty cool...

2006-03-20T23:31:00.000-08:00

It's not everyday you get a chance to be a part of an official NHL conference call regarding Nashville goalie Tomas Vokoun's selection as the NHL's Defensive Player of the Week. That's precisely the chance I got this afternoon while at the post office.

Naturally, I speeded back to campus, and took part. Despite having my phone disconnect near the end for no apparent reason, I was still able to sneak a question in at the end of the conference (which, by the way, was a huge thrill)

Here is the transcript of my question and his response:

Q. Looking at last season, you guys were kind of having trouble picking up points at the end of the year, but this season, you guys got off to a red hot start and got a lot of points early, and now you've got a pretty comfortable position in terms of making the playoffs. How important is it going to be for you guys to finish strong this year heading into April?

TOMAS VOKOUN: Well, I think it's important for any team, you want to win and you feel a lot better when you win the game. But sometimes you don't play as well as you would like to and you still win the game. I think we are all realizing here, we want to improve our game, because once April comes, there's no second chances. You lose four games in the playoff round and you're out and the whole season is done.

I think everybody understands, you just never know what's going to come next year and where you're going to play or what the team is going to look like. I think we have a pretty good chance to be successful. I mean, we are a great team and we have I think a lot of skill and we are very well-fitted for the new style of play.

So for us, it's important to improve, because we all know we play almost 70 games and we all know what we are good at. If we do stuff we are not good at, we are not a good hockey team. So we just have to put our game together and make sure we are doing the right things so when we step on the ice for the first playoff game, whoever is our opponent, we feel it's more important, at least for me personally, and I strongly believe for the team, to feel good about your game than worrying who you are playing against. If you struggle, and there's no really one team you can pick and say, well, we should beat this team or they should beat us. I think if you look at Detroit, they have 100 points. But even if you make the playoffs in the eighth spot, I really wouldn't bet either way. So it's more about you and how you feel and what you did to prepare for the playoffs.

A most delightful revelation

2006-03-05T12:12:00.000-08:00

http://www.ajc.com/sports/content/sports/braves/stories/0305renteria.html

In this article praising Braves new shortstop Edgar Renteria, the writer eventually asks Terry Pendleton what he thought about Renteria when the two played on the 1997 Marlins. Pendleton's response is fantastic.

Here's the previous sentence:

It did not take long before the Braves future hitting coach realized the youngster was in the right place.

"About three ground balls," Pendleton. "Loved to play. Couldn't wait to play. Wanted to learn. Respectful."

I might have to keep an eye out for this as the season progresses. Apparently Terry manages to speak in complete sentences without using a subject. The writer also forgot the word "said" after Pendleton.

If that's true, that has some delightful possibilities.

"Terry, how come the team only had two hits today?"

"Ball too fast. Can't see strike zone. Too busy fishing and golfing. Need slapped around. Lazy."

Sportsline isn't the only one that was wrong..

2006-03-04T18:09:00.000-08:00

http://sports.espn.go.com/ncb/photos?photoId=1071325&gameId=260632057

The AP got it wrong here too..

Belmont's Justin Hare, right, drives against Lipscomb's Andy Wicke during the Atlantic Sun Conference championship basketball game Saturday, March 4, 2006 in Johnson City, Tenn. Hare scored 32 points in the 74-69 overtime win. (AP Photo/Wade Payne)

Guess Andy was pulling double duty today :)

Come on now, little fella

2006-03-04T17:51:00.000-08:00

http://www.sportsline.com/collegebasketball/gamecenter/recap/NCAAB_20060304_DAVLIP@BEL
Not only was Belmont's win over Lipscomb broadcast to a nationally televised audience, they also had Daniel E. Dobish blog during the game!!! Wow!!!

If you click on the "glog" link, one of the first entries is this:

"Keep an eye on Belmont's Justin Hare, as he is the heart and soul for the Bruins and Atlantic Sun coach of the year Scott Sanderson."

Major props on the first half of that statement... but you might want to do your homework a tad better on who coaches whom..

Also, although AP Style might say differently, they are indeed called the "Bisons."

I wish I'd known beforehand that Lipscomb coach Scott Sanderson's dad was named Wimp though. Good one..

And then he has to end with this:

"Good for the Bruins, although that is a tough loss for the Bruins in this latest version of the Battle of the Boulevard."

Apparently it was good for the Bruins to deal a tough loss to the Bruins. Who knew?

Maybe I'm being a little too hard on Danny boy. It's all in good fun.

Cheers, mate!

Quite possibly the dumbest woman alive

2006-03-03T16:16:00.000-08:00

http://www.wesh.com/news/7630418/detail.html

And no, it's not Hillary Clinton. Although I guarantee you this genius is a registered Democrat.

The best sentences come at the end of the story:

"The suspects in the alleged attacks were cooperative with the investigation from its onset to the point of providing a video tape of the incident, which helped corroborate their account of the incident.

"Sunde was booked into the Orange County jail Friday, and was was also in possession of a small amount of marijuana at the time of her arrest, and was subsequently charged with possession of marijuana."

That about says it all.

Man registers .345 blood alcohol level

2006-02-27T17:21:00.000-08:00

http://www.azcentral.com/news/articles/0227endanger27-ON.html

Something for you college folks to shoot for.

Madonna Better After Horse Accident

2006-02-27T17:17:00.000-08:00

http://www.comcast.net/music/index.jsp?cat=MUSIC&fn=/2006/02/27/334666.html

Easily the most depressing headline I've read in a long, long time.

I punched someone today

2006-02-24T23:40:00.000-08:00

I punched someone today.

This happens quite rarely. In fact, I can probably count the number of people I've successfully punched on one hand (not that the list of people I've tried to punch and failed is that large either).

I could say I feel really sorry about it. But I don't. He had it coming.

It's one thing to antagonize somebody. I do it all the time. Perhaps too much.

It's another thing to continue antagonizing someone after they have repeatedly asked you to stop, and repeatedly threatened retribution if it doesn't stop.

It's still another thing to continue antagonizing someone, then when they start to make good on their promises, instead of backing down and stopping and/or laughing about it to lighten the mood, do something to intentionally make that person even madder.

When that happens, I stop feeling sorry.

As I approached, I got water thrown on me. Dirty water. That was a bad idea. He then more or less turtled at me, but I still snuck in a left.

It connected, but not too badly.

Needless to say, the situation wasn't worthy of Defcon 1, and ended immediately afterward.

But it still wasn't pretty.

The moral of the story is, it's not a good idea to continually antagonize someone about something they're testy and defensive about in the first place.

And if you're wondering why I'm willing to talk about this incident so publicly (albeit in a very vague manner), I figure that I'm writing about it where no one will ever read it: my blog.

From the "You Can't Make This Stuff Up" Files...

2006-02-24T08:29:00.000-08:00

http://www.heraldsun.news.com.au/common/story_page/0,5478,18260795%5E20322,00.html
Disgraced, impeached and disbarred former president Slick Willy was turned down at an Australian golf course, leading to the following quotation:

Ms Alley's regular golf partner, Lorraine Bramley, agreed: "We would have played with him -- golf, that is."

The story ends by saying Clinton, who has been known in the past to fudge (among other things) his score, did not want to reveal how he played at his replacement course.

For the record...

2006-02-23T15:55:00.000-08:00

http://www.belmontvision.com/news04.html

For the first time that I can remember, I was quoted for a newspaper story, instead of the other way around.

I have to say Alison did a good job with the story, but she did slightly take my comments out of context.

Here's what she wrote:

“This was a chance to see where I stacked up against some of the best. Seventh isn’t first, and third isn’t first. Next year I hope to do a little better,” Lowry said. (emphasis mine)

It's certainly true I said all that.

However, Alison didn't include what I said to preface those remarks.

Before the emphasized sentence, I said that I was certainly happy to win any kind of award, seeing as how I knew that many more people entered and did not win any kind of award. I also said I was proud of everyone else from Belmont for winning what they did.

That quote as is makes me sound slightly arrogant (and it probably was).

Personally, I am extremely competitive, perhaps too much so. When I go to compete in something, I go to win. I don't believe there is any other way to compete. Thus, it's always slightly disappointing when I don't win 1st place.

However, that doesn't mean that I can't be happy with getting something other than 1st. It just means there's room for improvement next time :)

To recap, I thought Alison did a great job, and I might be worrying just a bit too much. I just wanted to set the record straight.

Mystery blob eating Los Angeles

2006-02-21T10:30:00.000-08:00

http://www.dailynews.com/news/ci_3529716

Where are the Ghostbusters when we need them?